Saturday, February 27, 2016

Celebrities that Waited Until Marriage



Every week I always watch this talk show called The Real and one of the hosts is Tamera Mowry- Housley. She was on a show called Sister Sister on Disney Channel back when I was in Elementary school and I’ve always been a huge fan. On a lot of the episodes of The Real she talks about how she stayed a virgin until she was 28 and felt guilty after having sex with her now husband, Adam Housley, out of wedlock. After they had sex the first time they decided to wait until they were officially married to have sex again. This made me curious to know what other celebrities waited until marriage. So below I compiled a list of celebrities that either kept their virginity until marriage or famous couples that decided to recommit when they got in serious relationships.



Adriana Lima (Victoria Secret model) Despite dating several other high profile celebrities it was important for Lima to save herself for marriage. At the age of 27 she married her former husband Marko Jaric who previously played for the NBA.






Jessica Simpson (musician, designer, and actress) Simpson vowed to save herself for marriage publicly and did so before her first marriage to singer Nick Lachey in 2002.

  





Julianne Hough (dancer and actress) Hough grew up in a traditional Mormon household with the idea of saving herself for marriage being very emphasized. In the beginning of her career she had several interviews where she expressed her views on saving her virginity until after she was married. It isn't confirmed if she still lives by this choice or if she has changed her mind.





Grey’s Anatomy star Sarah Drew (actress) plays a character on the show named April Keppener who is a devout Christian that saved herself for marriage. Interestingly enough Drew actually lived out this same decision in her own life and married her current husband Peter Lanfer in 2002.





Carrie Underwood (musician) The dedicated Christian waited until she found her husband Mike Fisher and got married in 2010.







Heidi Montag (former reality TV star) Even though she lived on the party scene in Beverly Hills Montag still preserved her virginity until marrying her husband Spencer Pratt.



Lisa Kudrow, (actress) The beloved Friends star stayed true to herself and waited until she married her husband at age 31 before having sex.








Tina Fey (actress and comedian)  Fey was abstinent until marrying her husband when she was 24 years old.




 Lolo Jones (Olympic athlete) Professional athlete Lolo Jones is currently single and has described abstaining from sex as harder than training for the Olympics! 




Ciara (musician) and her boyfriend Russel Wilson, (Sea Hawks football player) are practicing celibacy in their relationship. Although Ciara was not practicing celibacy in other relationships prior to Wilson they decided mutually that in order to get to know each other and have a meaningful relationship they wanted to keep sex/physical things out of it.


Mariah Carey (musician) and Nick Cannon (producer, comedian, and actor) chose to save their first time having sex together until after their wedding to consummate their marriage. Even though they unfortunately divorced after 6 years.
  

Movie producer, actor, and Pastor Devon Franklin committed to celibacy for 10 years before meeting his wife, actress Meagan Good. 
     Good decided to become abstinent after experiencing many hard relationships in the past. After re-committing to save herself for marriage the Lord revealed to Good that Franklin would be her husband and eventually they dated. 
        Leading up to marriage they were both very intentional and kept God first in their relationship. They fasted together, prayed together and eventually got married in 2012.



Hopefully this post was interesting! Definitely let me know in the comments section below if you hear about anymore of your favorite celebs that were abstinent!

XOXO Pure Jess

For more reasons to wait check out my blog post Why Shouldn't I Just Have Sex?
To comment on posts you may have to click on the title and view the post separately from the home page! 
If this is your first time visiting my page make sure to read my introduction Pure Jess Introduction

Tuesday, February 23, 2016

What Motivates Me to Wait?

      My aunt asked me yesterday, What keeps me from wanting to have sex, and what motivates me to keep going? I had an answer immediately to what helps me the most…. God. My relationship with him is what drives me and keeps me motivated. There is no better accountability partner than Him. There’s no person, ring, or even yourself alone that can stop you from giving in to your flesh and your desires. I have strength through him. I can do all this through him who gives me strength. Phil. 4:13 The last thing I ever want to do is sound "preachy" but honestly when I think about it, I couldn’t do anything alone. I forgive because I know God always forgives me. I try my best to listen and give good advice because God is always there to listen whenever I call. 
    Waiting for marriage is something deep in my heart that I know he wants me to do. To fulfill my purpose and live my life I just have to wait. It’s hard to live by the Bible all the time, but you have to at least try to be in perfect pursuit. God honors all the sacrifices and choices that we make. He knows full well the discipline that is being practiced when following his word. You just have to seek him 100% with your whole heart. He wants the best for you and for all your desires to happen. How can someone not want to heed the advice of a loving father? God has all the answers, so there’s security. You’re not taking advice from a best friend who knows nothing or someone who may lead you astray. You’re literally getting help from the one who knows your future. He knows the secret turn you need to take, the passageway you have to find, and the number of nights it will be before you get there. He has designed special steps and a purpose just for you, so how can we not want to live out that journey that was made specifically for us.
    Knowing that I have such a great and loving God helps me live fearlessly. Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” Deut. 31:6. I’ve lost many friends, there are people who want to see me fail, and there are a lot of boys that never thought I was enough. But God has never left me, even when I’m not as faithful as I should be, even when I sin, even when I’ve tried to ignore his advice. When I come back he forgives me and loves me just the same. The grace he extends to people is paramount. He wants me to prosper and have whatever I need. For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jere. 29:11  All I am to the world is an 18 year old girl but He thinks enough of me to give my life meaning. God sees me as more, greater, and better so I decide to take his perspective on me and apply it when I do things. I’m definitely not perfect but like I said. I’m in pursuit. I’m growing, learning, transforming, and getting better every day. That’s the whole point of life. You never stop learning and you never stop getting better. You just need a driving force…. GOD.
   Speak to him today even if you haven’t in awhile his love is still there for you. Start with telling him about your day and how you’re feeling. Don’t make it complicated, don’t make it weird, and don’t wait! Right now is the perfect moment. Make that connection because it'll change everything. Make your moves intentionally, wait for your roommate/spouse to leave, find a place where you can be alone, do whatever you need to do and have a moment with Him. And don’t just do it once, sometimes people expect a two minute prayer once a year to reap abundance and get impatient when they don’t see results. God gives confirmation and you’ll know when you feel it. But you have to be ready and you have to be listening. Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. Matt. 7:7

XOXO Pure Jess

For more reasons to wait check out my blog post Why Shouldn't I Just Have Sex?
To comment on posts you may have to click on the title and view the post separately from the home page! 
If this is your first time visiting my page make sure to read my introduction Pure Jess Introduction

Friday, February 19, 2016

Why Shouldn't I Just Have Sex?

How many people do you know that have had negative consequences after sex? Probably a lot because I know most of my friends have some real horror stories. Sometimes while saving yourself even with knowing how it has effected others we still experience days when we wonder, Is it worth it to wait? Questioning if it would really be a big deal to have sex is normal. Below I have a few reasons that you can use to remind yourself why you decided to wait when those moments come.                                                                                                                                                                                                                1. Getting a Bad Reputation- At school things get around…secrets between two people are almost never kept secret. People will eventually start finding out if you and your boyfriend had sex. Whether that be the next day, the next week, or after the relationship ends, the truth will eventually come to the light. Even though a guy gets praised when his body count increases a girl gets a scarlet letter. That social norm is ridiculous but true. It goes under the same philosophy that a key that opens several locks is a master key. But a lock that will open with any key is a bad lock. Many girls have tried to excuse their sexual activity by claiming to “own their sexuality”, but it isn’t working. Guys talk to each other and when they hear about a girl having multiple sex partners they always come to the conclusion that she’s easy and that girl never gets considered as girlfriend material after she’s been known to be sleep around. Even if a girl has truly only had a few partners’ details and numbers always tend to get mixed up on the gossip mill. You don’t want to be the one shed in a bad light and not taken seriously. I’m definitely not promoting that you live life worried about what people think of you however your credibility is all you have and once you lose it you may never get it back.     
                                                                                                                   2. Introducing Potential for More Problems in your Relationship- Sex doesn’t fix everything, in fact it can cause more problems than it ends up solving. Some girls end up having sex because they feel like it’ll help the relationship last. They view their situation through a simple lens - Problem: your boyfriend wants to have sex -Solution: give him sex. This does sound really simple however it leaves out many details. The thing is, even though one problem is solved many others are created. Starting with, just because you did it once doesn’t mean you don’t have to do it again. Sex and the amount of it will be expected to be maintained.( Not to mention sometimes with the first time you may experience discomfort, pain, or bleeding.) Also studies show that girls are 3x more likely to feel used while having sex. Once you introduce sex into a relationship it can quickly become either a chore or used as a means of incentive. Which are not good purposes and lead to complications and break-ups when needs aren’t met and there is no strong foundation to fall back on. Many couples ranging from ages 14-21 think they are ready for sex far before they actually are. Unfortunately it’s already introduced by the time they see the error in their ways. It’s much harder to turn back around when you’ve already started having sex compared to if you just don’t at all.
Pure Tip: Be self-aware. Don’t think that just because you’re a year older that means you’re ready for sex. It’s a huge misconception that graduating from high school or living on your own makes you ready to commit to such a huge decision that has potential to ruin several aspects of your life.
 Also sometimes a month or less after a girl finally consents to having sex with a guy in the “safety” of their so-called committed relationship, boys have no problem breaking up with them. I’m not going to say men aren’t altered by sex but the emotional bond that is created doesn’t usually hold up as deeply for them as it does for us. V-cards don’t save relationships! You will never be able to exchange sex for love… it doesn’t work. 

3.Pregnancy and STDs- Hate to start discussing extreme situations here but let’s be honest it’s not that hard to get pregnant and it’s actually super easy to contract an STD or STI. Even if there is no sign of your partner having said problems that doesn’t mean that they really don’t. They might stay unaware until … you have to tell them. Condoms and even birth control are not 100% effective in protecting you. Partly because these means of contraception are often not used correctly and partly because nothing can completely ensure that you won’t get pregnant. As women, one of our many functions is the ability to create another human being so it’s hard to combat nature with a thin rubbery silicone thing (a condom). And please never take a guy’s claim for a great “pullout game” that seriously, especially when making the choice to have sex unprotected. Don’t let pregnancy or an STD happen to you. You have to think, Would you have an abortion? Are you going to finish school? Is your man going to leave you after giving you an incurable disease? Will your parents help you raise the baby? Will you risk getting a virus that can cause cancer or mess up your ovaries? What would you do if you found yourself in these situations? If you start having sex you’re going to at least have to come up with a plan and be ready to accept the consequences. OR… just wait until marriage.

Pure Tip: Always choose waiting for marriage lol!

4. The Aftermath of the Relationship – You don’t need experience. Sex is a natural function that our bodies were designed to do… you’ll figure it out just fine with your husband. Let it be known that if you don’t wait for marriage then you’re maximizing your chances to have several sexual partners because you’ll have multiple relationships. That being said as you continue to have different experiences you’ll be exposing yourself to interactions with men that won’t be there when you decide to finally “settle down”. Once you find your husband and you have sex with him because of human nature you may start comparing him to past sex experiences or be longing for the touch of a past boyfriend that was “better” in bed when your husband doesn’t mimic the exact experience that you had prior to him. As I’m sure you can imagine that leads to self-consciousness, jealousy, and unhappiness in a marriage. Why would anyone ever want to potentially introduce those things? Also, you have to think about soul ties which is a linkage in the soul realm between two people. It links their souls together and causes an extreme bond to form, usually after sexual intercourse. Said bonds are not easily broken and contribute to the reasons why women take so long to truly move on from a relationship. Don’t listen to any opinions trying to convince you to get your body count up for experience. Practice makes perfect in a lot of activities like sports and math. But is sex a sport? Is your body just a piece of equipment?                                   

5.Self Esteem Problems- Being naked in front of someone leaves you vulnerable. Your entire body is exposed in front of someone. The reason such strong feelings and connections are formed through sex is because it’s the closest you could ever be to someone.
       One of my guy friends explained “aftercare” to me. It’s that portion of time after sex when a guy is comforting a girl and they’re cuddling and continuing to bond after sex. Sometimes a guy does this because he wants to, while other times it’s because he feels like he has to. This is a very intimate time. As my friend explained to me this time can occasionally consist of giving the girl reassurance that her decision to have sex was the right one and that the guy appreciates it…… Of course guys want you feeling that assurance, if they let regret or doubt set in they know that means no more sex for them.             Often times when guys get bored or tired of sex self worth issues set in for the girl. In those cases when people break up a young girl is left wondering if her body was the problem. Low self-esteem creeps into other areas of life and a diminishing confidence is no good while trying to have other relationships, friendships, being at work, being in class, or even just combating sadness and trying to happy everyday. 

I hope some of these points were helpful in explaining why it’s a solid choice to save yourself and guard your body from the negative consequences of sex outside of marriage. Comment below and tell me what you think! Also feel free to leave me some suggestions on what you would like to read next week!


XOXO Pure Jess

To comment on posts you may have to click on the title and view the post separately from the home page!
Also if you liked this article feel free to check out the Pure Jess introduction if you haven't already!Pure Jess Introduction

Tuesday, February 16, 2016

Why I Wear A Purity Ring


    When I was a sophomore in high school I was a part of a girls mentoring program. During one of the monthly meetings a lot of our advisers shared their different stories and experiences in relationships. Most of them said they had sex too young or before marriage and regretted it. But, one woman stood out. This adviser,who was usually very quiet, shared her story and really left an impact on me. She explained that when she was 15 she made a promise to herself and started wearing a purity ring. She was able to keep that commitment and never removed her purity ring until she was engaged. She was very candid with the group about how hard it was but then talked about the special moment that she was able to have with her husband on their wedding day.
     Her story came out so genuine and so sweet. I had never heard anyone talk about saving themselves in that way. Of course in school they always throw out abstinence and I had had the "sex talk" with my Mom but something about the way the idea was being presented by this woman actually grabbed my attention.
     Prior to this experience I was always sure that when the "right long-term boyfriend" came along I would definitely be having sex with him  because.... "that's what people do". But after having heard this story it made me wonder if waiting for marriage and a purity ring was the right move for me. I went to YouTube and watched a few videos of girls talking about their purity rings but ultimately decided not to get one at the time because I didn't want to start wearing a ring and then be questioned about my virginity. I wasn't ashamed of it but I hadn't even been kissed and felt really concerned about what people would think about this ring. I didn't want anyone to think I was crazy or weird.
     Even though I decided not to get a purity ring at that time the story always stayed in the back of my head. It didn't become relevant again until my senior year. I had been getting really strong in my faith and my views on relationships were beginning to change. For the first time my church was offering a purity course and I was really excited to take it. Partly because I wanted to learn more about purity and partly out of curiosity. I wasn't sure how much I was actually going to take away from this class but I didn't have anything to lose. After the 8 week course I felt very sure that it was for the best that I wait for marriage. After all the Biblical study, real life research and stories from different women in the church I had several reasons for wanting to wait. I did get a purity ring at the end of the course but I didn't start wearing it because I felt unsure about actually promising God that I would wait. Vowing to God about anything is serious and I didn't want to tell him I was going to do something that I wasn't. Even though I truly did want to wait I wasn't convinced that I really could. I hadn't been kissed, been in any relationships or experienced that much so I doubted that I could control myself once I got in these situations. I mean come on, why would "everyone" be having sex if it was easy to wait for marriage.
    This brings me to my first semester in college during Summer 2015. I could write a whole book on the events that took place with me and my new friends during just six weeks. But, anyway for the purposes of this blog post just know that by the time Summer B ended I was completely convinced that sex ruled everything and there was going to be no hope of me having a boyfriend or a life without it. I continued through Fall semester still thinking this way and really trying to figure out what I was going to do. As I saw my friends relationships all I saw was v-cards being lost and body counts being increased, In the back on my head I felt like it was just a matter of time before the same thing happened to me too. I went on a few dates but luckily nothing ever happened. As much as I wanted to be carefree I just couldn't do it. Saving myself, the purity course, and visions of God looking down on me prevented me from going too far.
     After I had time away from my friends and my college surroundings during winter break I really had a lot of time to reflect. Conversations with my family and even thoughts to myself solidified that I really wanted to wait. Prayer time gave me a new found confidence that not only could I do it but it was the best choice for my life in the long-run. I had dreams of writing a book on Purity, giving motivational speeches and staying in-line with the plans that God has for my life, so the choice was clear.On tv and in the media sex is so over-glorified, they rarely show the severity of the damage that it causes women and young girls after the fact. I had witnessed guys breaking up with my friends after sex, pregnancy scares and more in an extremely short period and after seeing the emotional damage it became even more obvious to me that the Bible and Gods will is right. I tried to deny it and push it out of my mind but the rules said in the Bible are there to protect us.
      You have to guard yourself and be careful. It's so obvious that we as people were meant to only have one sexual partner in life. As that number increases and increases it gives you unwanted ties with people that have to be left in the past. You can't give your body to a boyfriend and people you barely know. Sex is losing it's meaning, but it was created to bind two people as one and consummate a marriage, rather or not someone wants to acknowledge that is on them. I knew I had to make my own choices, set my own standards, and keep them high for my own well being. I didn't want to be that girl crying on the phone at 3:00am after sex, getting broken up with when a guy was bored of my body, having to visit the doctor and get tested for an STD.... God forbid my period comes late and I'm forced to buy a pregnancy test from the campus clinic. Not to mention the conversation I would have to have with my Mom, future husband, or even my future daughter about why I let lust run my decisions.
      There's so much to loose when you give yourself away and after such a revelation I couldn't continue lying to myself any longer.
So I used my Christmas money and got a purity ring that I would be happy to wear everyday. It signifies my vow to God to save myself for marriage but also my commitment to myself to keep my goals and future in mind. Distractions and outside influences can so quickly poison the mind when you aren't focused on the right things and I didn't want to be so susceptible anymore. One false move and I could've easily joined the club of many that "accidentally had sex", so I had to get focused.
Pure Tip: Leave time in your day for self reflection! That personal time will help give you clarity.
      A ring can't technically stop you from doing anything, in fact I know someone that wore a purity ring, started having sex, and still continued to wear her ring as she increased her number of partners. So don't think that getting one is the equivalent to a chastity belt. But, it does help as a daily reminder of your promise. Even though you can make the commitment to God and yourself without any tangible evidence. It's all what you deem is best for your life. For me there are no coincidences and having a purity ring  has been in my mind for years so I just had to get one and at least try it out. Things fell into place so perfectly and I felt like God was guiding my path right to this decision. So far it's one of the best choices I've ever made!
     Comment below and let me know how this post made you feel and if you have any additional questions about purity rings. I'm definitely planning on doing a purity ring Q&A soon! Thanks so much for reading!

XOXO Pure Jess


P.S. The photos attached to this post are my actual Purity Ring! I got it from Pandora!

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Saturday, February 13, 2016

Do's and Don'ts of Dating While Saving Yourself in College

  It’s hard to start dating a guy nowadays while trying to avoid the physical things. Our generation in 2016 has truly created a "Hookup Culture". Meaning that sex now has a place in any level of a relationship. Trying to preserve your virginity for marriage has seemingly become a foreign concept in a lot of ways. Because of over-sexualized commercials, one-night stands glorified on tv, and living together before marriage becoming socially acceptable it's really difficult to try and combat that. But, even with odds stacked against you, you don't have to feel like there's any goal you can't reach. If you want to save yourself for marriage you can do it, if you actually set your mind to it. But, once you start dating someone you can’t lose sight of those goals, because saving yourself while you’re in a relationship is a much bigger challenge than when you’re single. So how do you avoid the physical stuff? How do you get treated how you deserve? How do live each day in your relationship with the appropriate boundaries? These are the questions that every girl wants to know. Below I have some quick DO’s and DON’TS that’ll help you start moving in the right direction.

DO’s
  • Say what you want -Every girl that guys encounter has different standards so sometimes boys aren’t sure where to start. That being said you may have to point them in the right direction, but that’s okay. You don’t have to settle for less, a guy should want to make you happy and meet your standards. If he doesn’t want to put in the effort then that’s a major red flag and you should just STOP everything. I’m not referring to any “diva demands” here, but the simple things count and if he isn't putting in enough effort in the beginning then you already know that as time goes on things will only get worse. A strong foundation has to be set in order for your relationship to thrive. If you want a guy to walk you to your door, set up the dates or do particular things then mention it. Don’t lay down your standards to meet what he wants to put up. If you act like you’re not expecting much then you're setting a strong precedence that will only harm you in the long run.

  • Communicate Clearly -The more serious the issue, the more direct you should be about it. If you don’t want to do something, then set those boundaries. In most cases when “things go too far” physically, it’s because there was never a discussion about how much was too much. You don’t want to get caught up in the moment and get pushed passed the line you promised yourself wouldn't be crossed. Bringing this subject up can sometimes be awkward, and a lot of girls worry about how their boyfriends will feel about it. But, if you’re that worried he’s going to leave you then that’s a clear sign you shouldn’t be with him. If you have a trust and a bond with someone then you should feel comfortable with talking to them about things. That’s why it is important NOT to get physical. Those aspects always have a way of taking over the relationship. A true relationship connection needs a strong foundation that’s based on things outside of intimacy. Otherwise when the sex gets old (and it will) he'll be moving on to the next girl.

  • Remember your worth - Pebbles get stepped over and diamonds are treasured forever. Don't let a guy determine your worth, you should already have it set. Don't let him down play you. Just because the last girl he was with never held him accountable for anything doesn't mean that you have to follow suit. Your standards are already higher! Hopefully before you get exclusive with someone these things are established but if not, it's never too late to speak up for how you want your relationship to be. We have to be bold and take a stand for ourselves sometimes.

  • Cut him some slack- Nobody is perfect and he is learning and growing just like you. Flaws are a part of every person, sometimes us girls have the habit of dreaming of prince charming from the movies and forget that he's not actually real. The same way that you have imperfections is the same way that your boyfriend will. Coming up with an unattainable list of things he must do, be, or have is not going to find you any happiness. College is a major time of growth and transition which isn't always pretty, so be reasonable with your expectations.

  • Be appreciative -When a guy does something wrong he's going to have consequences (most likely including anger or pettiness) so if he does something right you should still react…with some gratitude. Sometimes, just as I said before, girls can miss standards and hit entitlement. You don’t want to become an ungrateful turn off, so be sure to be thankful. When you do things for him you’ll be expecting the same appreciation, and in order to get certain treatment you have to give it. Hypocrites are no fun.


Don'ts
  •  Being on the bed together - In a college dorm the only seating options are 1 desk chair and your bed. So when you have a guest (especially a guy) it’s hard to know where to put them when they’re in your room. I’m suggesting ANYWHERE besides the bed. Even though it’s the normal place where you and your friends probably sit, it’s still potentially leading into a situation you want to avoid. Sitting on your bed with your girlfriends is different than sitting there with your boyfriend. I suggest ushering him to a seat that’s pre-planned. That way after he sits you can sit on your bed and have him in your chair or somewhere else. If you leave it up to him to choose you’re going to end up somewhere you don’t want to be.

     Pure Tip: If he tries to prompt you to accompany him on the bed, then offer him some food or a drink. By the time you give it to him he'll forget he asked and you can quickly sit somewhere else.

  • Have Sleepovers -Never sleep over if you intend on keeping the V-card. If you start napping with him or sleeping with him then you are partaking in an intimate time that is supposed to be reserved for marriage. You may think that you’re just sleeping but being under those covers is going to eventually wreak havoc. Even if the first time stays appropriate it will slowly progress into more. Colleges only provide small twin beds after all so it's not like you can lay down that far apart……

  • Pay too much attention to what your friends are doing- . You have your own pace and you must trust your pace! Every rule you've made is for a reason. When you look at your friend’s relationships, they might be showing all kinds of PDA and doing activities that you want to keep out of your relationship. Everyone is different and you can’t feel pressured to keep up with what "everybody is doing". If your end goal (saving yourself) is different then there’s, then that’s probably why the variables of your relationships will also differ. Don’t get distracted or intimidated, just focus on what you are doing in your life. (Obviously, your friends aren’t taking any pages out of your book). That’s easier said than done, but you and your partner can work on it. The boundaries you’ve set can’t be broken… once you blur the lines you’ve drawn, they are bound to be completely erased within a matter of time

  • Become a tease -Eluding that you're willing to do something that you're not is NEVER a good idea. If you aren’t planning on crossing any lines, then don’t act like you will. Becoming an unreliable tease is not a good look. Don’t lose credibility by exhibiting inappropriate behavior that is inconsistent with how you want to be viewed. Once you make him think you’re going to do something and then you renege last minute, you’re just going to cause confusion in your relationship. Keep your actions consistent with your words.

  • Build your life around him- Make sure you continue to pursue your goals and dreams first even when you have a boyfriend. 9/10 times relationships are temporary,you want to enjoy them but if you make them the center of your life then when it’s over you have to consider what condition you’ll be in. Exclusively dating someone is NOT A MARRIAGE so keep your priorities in line. (hint hint Mr. Right comes after God, yourself, and your schoolwork.)

  • Be alone in your room - It happens on occasion but you have to try and get out of those situations. You can always talk alone in a restaurant, outside on a bench or another spot that is in a public space. Of course you want alone time, but that doesn’t mean you have to be completely alone, or in your room with quick access to a bed. You don’t want to put yourself in circumstances that could quickly lead you to “messing up”.

I really hope these tips help you out. It can be hard to follow rules, but in the long run once you reach your goal, these things will be minuscule. And you’ll have much stronger relationships by relying on conversation and fun experiences rather than physical connection. As I stated earlier it's easier said than done but that doesn't mean it can't happen!


XOXO Pure Jess

P.S.  To comment on posts you have to click on the title and view it separately from the home page!